Post by Big Brother on Jul 4, 2004 5:47:17 GMT -5
Being something of a connoisseur of technobabble (somewhat-realistic explanations for the patently impossible bits of technology in Sci-Fi, such as warp drives and so forth), one of the more frustrating things about reading the HP series was the appalling lack of any serious explanation as to how magic and the various magical technologies (flying cars, wands, rememberalls, Skiving Snackboxes, etc.) actually work.
Of course, if there was a coherent, logical explanation of how magic worked, it would be science, not magic.
But that doesn't mean we can't TRY to remedy JKR's lack of scientific understanding (since Snape is based on her old Chemistry teacher, we can understand how she got turned off on science in general) and come up with some semi-plausible explanations as to how stuff might function. For the fanfic writers here, consider this background information to let you treat spells and wands and such in a consistent manner. For everyone else, consider it a fun thought experiment.
Okay, now, topic #1: Wands
A.) What the heck are wands FOR?
Wands are obviously not entirely necessary: witness the many instances of wandless magic, such as Harry often does in Little Whinging, and Dumbledore has a penchant for in the movies. Wands do appear to allow greater control and perhaps power than wandless spells, although wandless magic such as animagi and metamorphmagi self-transformations can indeed be quite precise and profound.
Tangent: "Metamorphmagi" is easily the dumbest made-up term JKR ever came up with. How someone responsible for such cool terms as "occlumency" and "legilimency" and "arithmancy" could have stumbled so badly is beyond me.
Tangent 2: Anyone else think Tonks' hair-color shifting might have been a nod to Beka Valentine in "Andromeda"? The show came out before OotP was published, so it's possible...
B.) What's the purpose of the core?
Obviously, by using unobtainable materials such as unicorn hairs and phoenix feathers, JKR has a ready explanation for why just any stick you pick up off the ground won't work. According to Lolua (have to take her word for this, don't have the books in easy reach to check at the moment) at some point the books claim that there are only three core materials: unicorn tail hairs, phoenix feathers, and dragon heartstrings. Yet I seem to recall that Fleur Delacourt's wand is described as having a Veela hair at it's core, one of her grandmother's hairs in fact. So perhaps pretty much any fibrous bit of a magical creature will do. Would one of Hermione's hairs work? How about Hagrid's hairs, seeing as being part giant might be as magical as being Veela. Perhaps Hagrid's wand that he hides in the umbrella is not his old student-days wand, but a new one he made himself -- he knows to give wood lice to bowtruckles when taking wood, and even if his own hairs don't work, he's got ample access to a variety of magical creatures.
Tangent: How the heck do they get the hair/feather/etc. IN there, anyways? Lolua and I hand-made some toy wands for use with our costumes we wore to see PoA in the theaters. Getting a feather into a hole drilled in a thin piece of wood is not easy. Perhaps they split the wood lengthwise, lay the hair in a fitted groove, then rejoin the halves, similar to how Amazon-basin native peoples make blowguns? Perhaps they drill the hole slightlhy wider than the hair, use some spell to make the hair stiff and straight, then pour in some sort of glue or sealant to keep it in place? Perhaps they use that stiffening spell, then hammer it in like a nail?
Tangent 2: Of course, if they use magic spells requiring a wand to make wands, the obvious chicken-and-egg problem ensues: How do you make the first wand in history?
C: Is the wood all that important?
Aside from being fairly straight (and I can speak from experience that it's not easy finding a perfectly straight branch of a reasonable length that isn't so thick you need a lathe to slim it down to size), will only certain trees work? Ironwood, balsa, mahogany, witch hazel, that Brazilian tree that smells like a fart when you cut it, and so on, all work pretty much the same? Does it have to be a real tree, or will a woody-stemed bush work just as well? Would metal, plastic, or stone work? If not, does varnish or paint or woodstain interfere with the wand's operation? The ones in the movie sure seem to be heavily stained and varnished -- Lucius Malfoy's wand looks painted with black enamel, and I seem to recall it having some sort of metallic thing around the grip.
Tangent: We know from canon that when a wizard is kicked out of the Wizarding world (expelled from Hogwarts, sent to Azkaban, etc.), that their weand is broken in half. So...when some Death Eaters get captured near the end of OotP, caught red-handed, why doesn't anyone thing to just snap each of their wands over their knee, and then just leave Neville or somesuch to watch over them, safe in the knoweldge that the DE's are limited to Wandless Magic?
D.) What the heck is with this "the wand chooses the wizard" malarkey?
Are wands actually sentient? Could Voldy's wand rebel against him and refuse to do any more curses? Could Hermione's wand just be smarter than Ron's, and Neville get stuck with a retarded wand? And if (as in the books) pretty much nothing happens if you wave around a wand that isn't meant for you, or (as in the movies) it just tosses furniture around and makes a big mess when you do so, why the heck can seemingly anyone grab someone else's wand and use it with no ill effects? The only time someone has something go wrong when using a wand that isn't theirs, it's because Gildylocks is using Ron's broken wand. Incompetent wizard, badly spellotaped wand, yeah, that shouldn't work. But then neither should any of the other times people use stolen/captured wands.
Tangent: Um, hasn't anyone thought to apply Molly Weasley's incredibly astute rule of "Never trust anything that thinks for itself if you can't see where it keeps its brain" to wands choosing wizards? I suddenly have this vision of all the wands in the Wizarding World suddenly going on strike and demanding more frequent polishing and rest homes (old pipe racks and sword cases, perhaps) for wands of retired/deceased wizards.
Phew. Anyone else have any thoughts on the rules that wands must obey in the potterverse?
Of course, if there was a coherent, logical explanation of how magic worked, it would be science, not magic.
But that doesn't mean we can't TRY to remedy JKR's lack of scientific understanding (since Snape is based on her old Chemistry teacher, we can understand how she got turned off on science in general) and come up with some semi-plausible explanations as to how stuff might function. For the fanfic writers here, consider this background information to let you treat spells and wands and such in a consistent manner. For everyone else, consider it a fun thought experiment.
Okay, now, topic #1: Wands
A.) What the heck are wands FOR?
Wands are obviously not entirely necessary: witness the many instances of wandless magic, such as Harry often does in Little Whinging, and Dumbledore has a penchant for in the movies. Wands do appear to allow greater control and perhaps power than wandless spells, although wandless magic such as animagi and metamorphmagi self-transformations can indeed be quite precise and profound.
Tangent: "Metamorphmagi" is easily the dumbest made-up term JKR ever came up with. How someone responsible for such cool terms as "occlumency" and "legilimency" and "arithmancy" could have stumbled so badly is beyond me.
Tangent 2: Anyone else think Tonks' hair-color shifting might have been a nod to Beka Valentine in "Andromeda"? The show came out before OotP was published, so it's possible...
B.) What's the purpose of the core?
Obviously, by using unobtainable materials such as unicorn hairs and phoenix feathers, JKR has a ready explanation for why just any stick you pick up off the ground won't work. According to Lolua (have to take her word for this, don't have the books in easy reach to check at the moment) at some point the books claim that there are only three core materials: unicorn tail hairs, phoenix feathers, and dragon heartstrings. Yet I seem to recall that Fleur Delacourt's wand is described as having a Veela hair at it's core, one of her grandmother's hairs in fact. So perhaps pretty much any fibrous bit of a magical creature will do. Would one of Hermione's hairs work? How about Hagrid's hairs, seeing as being part giant might be as magical as being Veela. Perhaps Hagrid's wand that he hides in the umbrella is not his old student-days wand, but a new one he made himself -- he knows to give wood lice to bowtruckles when taking wood, and even if his own hairs don't work, he's got ample access to a variety of magical creatures.
Tangent: How the heck do they get the hair/feather/etc. IN there, anyways? Lolua and I hand-made some toy wands for use with our costumes we wore to see PoA in the theaters. Getting a feather into a hole drilled in a thin piece of wood is not easy. Perhaps they split the wood lengthwise, lay the hair in a fitted groove, then rejoin the halves, similar to how Amazon-basin native peoples make blowguns? Perhaps they drill the hole slightlhy wider than the hair, use some spell to make the hair stiff and straight, then pour in some sort of glue or sealant to keep it in place? Perhaps they use that stiffening spell, then hammer it in like a nail?
Tangent 2: Of course, if they use magic spells requiring a wand to make wands, the obvious chicken-and-egg problem ensues: How do you make the first wand in history?
C: Is the wood all that important?
Aside from being fairly straight (and I can speak from experience that it's not easy finding a perfectly straight branch of a reasonable length that isn't so thick you need a lathe to slim it down to size), will only certain trees work? Ironwood, balsa, mahogany, witch hazel, that Brazilian tree that smells like a fart when you cut it, and so on, all work pretty much the same? Does it have to be a real tree, or will a woody-stemed bush work just as well? Would metal, plastic, or stone work? If not, does varnish or paint or woodstain interfere with the wand's operation? The ones in the movie sure seem to be heavily stained and varnished -- Lucius Malfoy's wand looks painted with black enamel, and I seem to recall it having some sort of metallic thing around the grip.
Tangent: We know from canon that when a wizard is kicked out of the Wizarding world (expelled from Hogwarts, sent to Azkaban, etc.), that their weand is broken in half. So...when some Death Eaters get captured near the end of OotP, caught red-handed, why doesn't anyone thing to just snap each of their wands over their knee, and then just leave Neville or somesuch to watch over them, safe in the knoweldge that the DE's are limited to Wandless Magic?
D.) What the heck is with this "the wand chooses the wizard" malarkey?
Are wands actually sentient? Could Voldy's wand rebel against him and refuse to do any more curses? Could Hermione's wand just be smarter than Ron's, and Neville get stuck with a retarded wand? And if (as in the books) pretty much nothing happens if you wave around a wand that isn't meant for you, or (as in the movies) it just tosses furniture around and makes a big mess when you do so, why the heck can seemingly anyone grab someone else's wand and use it with no ill effects? The only time someone has something go wrong when using a wand that isn't theirs, it's because Gildylocks is using Ron's broken wand. Incompetent wizard, badly spellotaped wand, yeah, that shouldn't work. But then neither should any of the other times people use stolen/captured wands.
Tangent: Um, hasn't anyone thought to apply Molly Weasley's incredibly astute rule of "Never trust anything that thinks for itself if you can't see where it keeps its brain" to wands choosing wizards? I suddenly have this vision of all the wands in the Wizarding World suddenly going on strike and demanding more frequent polishing and rest homes (old pipe racks and sword cases, perhaps) for wands of retired/deceased wizards.
Phew. Anyone else have any thoughts on the rules that wands must obey in the potterverse?
