Post by Lolua on Aug 4, 2005 5:32:20 GMT -5
So Mlle and I were RPing a bit, and in the course of it I mouthed off to Professor Snape concerning his treatment of Harry. He took twenty points from Ravenclaw and threatened me with detention, which I managed to get out of when I, uh, convinced him that it would be even less fun for him than for me. 
So he changed my punishment to a five-roll essay on the collection and uses of Stinksap. I asked him if he really wanted to read a five-roll essay on such a boring subject, and he professed that he had no intention of reading it.
With that in mind, I decided I would write a five-roll poem on the collection and uses of Stinksap. For your reading pleasure, I present the first roll:
Lolua Kroze
Punishment Essay
1
Stinksap is the greatest stuff,
Though it may smell and it's real tough.
But if you know how it is used
You won't feel foolish or confused.
2
There is a wise professor who
Knows how to grow and collect it too.
His name is Snape and he's so smart,
Although he has a cold, dead heart.
3
The Head of House for Slytherin,
He makes sure they always win
By using trickery so foul
And wearing a white mask and cowl.
4
He gets his Stinksap by owl post
Because the student he scares the most
Owns the plant that produces it
And will not share with him a bit.
5
The plant is rare and kind of lame
Mimbulus mimbletonia is its name
Its color gray, its growth is stunted;
In Assyria the plant is hunted
And brought to market, where it's sold,
The potted plant exchanged for gold.
6
And this is where the uncle came
To buy a present for the same
Young boy named Neville Longbottom
Whom Snape had tortured when he taught 'im.
7
Uncle Algie brought it back,
Indulging his great-nephew's knack
For Herbology, that useful art
In which young Neville's really smart.
8
The school did not have its own plant
That Stinksap from its leaves would grant
The Potions Master filled that lack
With store-bought Stinksap in his rack.
9
Good Neville offered up his own,
But since his plant was just half-grown,
Professor Sprout thought it not fair
To take it from her student's care.
10
If Snape were clever (or just kind),
He'd know the place where he could find
Fresh Stinksap by the bucketload --
But he has closed off that smooth road.
Though Neville's is the closer source
Snape must purchase his perforce.
So he changed my punishment to a five-roll essay on the collection and uses of Stinksap. I asked him if he really wanted to read a five-roll essay on such a boring subject, and he professed that he had no intention of reading it. With that in mind, I decided I would write a five-roll poem on the collection and uses of Stinksap. For your reading pleasure, I present the first roll:
Lolua Kroze
Punishment Essay
The Collection and Uses of Stinksap
1
Stinksap is the greatest stuff,
Though it may smell and it's real tough.
But if you know how it is used
You won't feel foolish or confused.
2
There is a wise professor who
Knows how to grow and collect it too.
His name is Snape and he's so smart,
Although he has a cold, dead heart.
3
The Head of House for Slytherin,
He makes sure they always win
By using trickery so foul
And wearing a white mask and cowl.
4
He gets his Stinksap by owl post
Because the student he scares the most
Owns the plant that produces it
And will not share with him a bit.
5
The plant is rare and kind of lame
Mimbulus mimbletonia is its name
Its color gray, its growth is stunted;
In Assyria the plant is hunted
And brought to market, where it's sold,
The potted plant exchanged for gold.
6
And this is where the uncle came
To buy a present for the same
Young boy named Neville Longbottom
Whom Snape had tortured when he taught 'im.
7
Uncle Algie brought it back,
Indulging his great-nephew's knack
For Herbology, that useful art
In which young Neville's really smart.
8
The school did not have its own plant
That Stinksap from its leaves would grant
The Potions Master filled that lack
With store-bought Stinksap in his rack.
9
Good Neville offered up his own,
But since his plant was just half-grown,
Professor Sprout thought it not fair
To take it from her student's care.
10
If Snape were clever (or just kind),
He'd know the place where he could find
Fresh Stinksap by the bucketload --
But he has closed off that smooth road.
Though Neville's is the closer source
Snape must purchase his perforce.